Stop Going Back to Captivity

"However, if you say, 'We will not stay in this land,' and so disobey the Lord your God, and if you say, 'No, will will go and live in Egypt, where we will not see war or hear the trumpet or be hungry for bread,' then hear the word of the Lord, O remnant of Judah. This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says: 'If you are determined to go to Egypt and you go to settle there, then the sword you fear will overtake you there, and the famine you dread will follow you to Egypt, and there you will die." Jeremiah 42:13-16

When I read this passage, I immediately recognized the irony in it. These people were the survivors who hadn't been taken to captivity in Babylon. God was telling them to stay in Judah and be His remnant there; but instead after they had seen all the destruction that had come in their land, they decided that Egypt was a better place for them. If you know anything at all about the Israelites, then you know that they were slaves in Egypt at one time and God had set them free by bringing plagues against the land and the people who lived there, including the plague on the firstborn. The Egyptians had treated them harshly, and God had saved the Israelites when they cried out, and made them His chosen people. Here in Jeremiah, many generations later, they decided they wanted to go back to this territory to settle because they feared being hungry for bread, among other things.

How many of us fear being hungry when we try to lose weight? I know I do. I hate being hungry. I hate feeling light-headed and desiring the taste of something that I know I can't have. It's easy to be overweight - you simply eat whatever sounds good. But, it's a struggle to maintain weight and even harder to start losing it. That said, we knowingly go right back into captivity when we give into our fears rather than trust God. We don't like being hungry, so we willingly go right back where we started. It sounds awful, but I've done it time and time again.

And what does God promise His beloved people who go back into captivity? For one, the famine they dread will follow them there, and more importantly, they will die there. If we don't obey God's instructions of where He wants us to go and if we put more emphasis on our desire for food than His will for our lives, then the good He has planned for us will instead end in destruction. God wanted the people in this passage to be His remnant in His land and rebuild it. Instead, they gave into their desires for an 'easier' life; and God warned them up front, through Jeremiah, that this was NOT His plan for them and that they would die of the very things they feared when they went to Egypt. Unfortunately, this people didn't listen to God's warnings. They found out the hard way that when God says He's going to do something, He means it. He only speaks truth. And while He's gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, He also is just and righteous.

I keep reading throughout these pages of Isaiah, Jeremiah, Lamentations and Ezekiel of how much God warned His beloved people. They were doing detestable things, including worshiping other gods, and yet He sent His messengers to speak to them in love and promised to relent if they would turn from their wicked ways and follow Him wholeheartedly. When they didn't, He followed through on His word that He had sent to His prophets. Today I realized that we're in a similar situation. We can choose to do things the way we've always done them, giving ourselves comfort through food rather than laying down our fear of being hungry and giving it to God. Or, we can say that we realize we'll die in captivity if we don't make a significant change and follow God wholeheartedly in this struggle.

We may not know what that looks like, but we can trust in our compassionate God, who will reward our obedience by saving us! Only through Christ can we be saved from a life of sin. We need forgiveness and we need redemption - we need a 180 turn from our old patterns. Let's not go back to Egypt. Let's press on toward what God has planned for our lives! Who's with me?

Dear Heavenly Father, we come to You today and admit that we fear being hungry. So many times we've allowed that fear to take us right back to our place of captivity, where we are slaves to our cravings and food addiction. We pray that today, we can make a stand once and for all to stay in the place that You have created for us - a life where we rely on You alone. Forgive us, oh God, of our sin. Help us turn from our wicked ways through Your salvation. Show us compassion. And I pray that we would see the outcome of this decision - that You would please make us healthy and thin for Your glory. We return to You with our whole hearts. No longer will we serve other things. Be glorified and praised today! In Jesus' name, AMEN!

My Food is To Do God's Will

"'My food,' said Jesus, 'is to do the will of Him who sent me and to finish His work.'" John 4:34

After Jesus spoke with a Samaritan woman, He met up with His disciples who urged Him to 'eat something' and His first response was "I have food to eat that you know nothing about." Then, when they wondered if someone else had brought Him food, the above verse was His response. His food was to do God's will. WOW!

Have you ever had someone urge you to eat when you're fasting or when you're trying to eat less? 'You have to eat,' they say. 'It's not good for you to starve.' 'Your body was made for food,' etc. And while all those may be true, there are times that we're to worry a whole lot less about the food we eat and a whole lot more about the will of the Lord and what work He has for us.

I remember times in the past - particularly one family camping weekend - when I would think about when we'd eat before we even left and wonder if I should pack things to take along so we wouldn't starve. Now I laugh at myself (thankfully I can). STARVE!?!?! Really??? I have enough body fat that it would take awhile for me to look like I'm starving. Being hungry and starving are far different things. I would eat again. I would eat that day. I wouldn't necessarily eat on my schedule that I was used to. And yet, thinking about it would drive me crazy. It would make me not even want to go.

I've noticed lately how one side of my family plans their functions around meals. Now, I understand that we all have children who typically eat on a schedule. But, as we plan our days out, meals are a top priority. Then the other side of my family plans their fun activities and figures that we'll eat when we have time, whatever we can grab, and it doesn't truly matter. Guess which side is heavier. 

The Bible tells us not to worry about food, and we always think of that verse in terms of God providing for us so we don't have to wonder where our meals will come from. I think this verse above speaks more to the fact that we're not to think about food but rather focus on God and finish the work He has called us to do.

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for Your Son and the example that Jesus is to us. Thank You that even though He was human and hungry, He knew that serving You and doing Your will was far more important than food. Please help us learn this lesson in whatever way You mean for us to 'digest' it. Help us do Your will and finish Your work here on earth. Thank You for providing for us both physically with food and spiritually with Your Word. Keep us growing on the inside and slimming down on the outside. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

An Easier Way?

"Then Jesus said to his disciples, 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.'" Matthew 16:24

I was listening to a sermon this past Sunday and just a small snippet of it focused on the temptation on going an easier way. The entire sermon was on living up to your potential and not taking the 'shadow mission' which looks good but is 10 degrees off our actual purpose in life. If Esther would have taken her 'shadow mission' she would have just been a beauty queen instead of serving her purpose of saving Israel. We have a unique plan from God, but we need to keep on the right track.

The speaker then went on to talk about Jesus' suffering and how sometimes to live up to our mission, we're going to have to take the tough road. One example he used was from Matthew 4:2-4: "After fasting forty days and forty nights, He was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, 'If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.' Jesus answered, 'It is written "Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God."'" First of all, I can't imagine fasting for 40 days and nights. Trying to fast one day has felt like an eternity to me. Jesus had the power to make bread for Himself, and yet He knew that He must withhold for some reason that God had called Him to - maybe to make the exact point that we are to live on the words of God.

His point in these verses was that Satan kept trying to tempt Him to take the easy road. That's why when Peter said that Jesus didn't have to suffer on the cross, Jesus answered him so sharply with "get behind me, Satan!" See Matthew 16:20-24. Jesus knew that the suffering on the cross was God's will so that we could be reconciled to the Father.

As I thought about these words and everything Jesus went through, I realized that there probably must be some suffering in this journey of losing weight. Saying no to particular foods feels like suffering to me! Exercising can feel like suffering. There are days that I want God to just snap His fingers and make me skinny. And I firmly believe He could. But, He has a grander plan for my life. Suffering is probably a part of that so that I learn to live on His Word in the process. As the above verse states, we're going to have to deny ourselves to follow Jesus. Let's start with food & comfort and see where God takes us on this journey to be what He has called us to be. Pray for me, and I will pray for you!

Dear Heavenly Father, I lay myself and my dear friends reading this down before you. The sound of suffering sounds... well, painful, to be honest. I don't like suffering. You know my heart, Lord. And yet, I truly do want to be Your follower. Help me to deny myself and take up my cross to be who You want me to be. Help those reading this as well. God, I can't imagine the torture of fasting 40 days and nights. Please help us live on Your words rather than the comfort of food. Please help us in this journey to be healthy and thin... may we not just seek the world's approval but rather Your good & pleasant will for our lives. We honor You and lay our hearts & bodies & minds before You. Lord, have Your way. Your kingdom come, Your will be done. We love You and honor You today. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

No One Whose Hope Is In You Will Ever Be Put to Shame

"No one whose hope is in You will ever be put to shame, but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse." Psalm 25:3

This morning at church, we sang a familiar song by Cory Asbury called "You Are My Hope." I remember the first time ever worshiping to it, feeling much like today. I cried out to God singing "All my hope's in You, my strength, my song!" Only God can deliver us, and when we put our hope in Him, the Bible tells us in the above verse that we won't be put to shame.

As I write this, as I've been praying to God, as I've confessed my sin and struggle to others... to then live a life where I never am free from obesity... I think that would make me feel ashamed. But, my hope is in God. Likewise, I read within the past day or two Isaiah 45:17, which says "But Israel will be saved by the LORD with an everlasting salvation; you will never be put to shame or disgraced, to ages everlasting."

 After worship came the sermon, where God very much spoke to me again through youth pastor Jason Mitchell (now I know his name and title!) from LCBC. Today was the last sermon from the series "Flip Side," which I have thoroughly enjoyed, even though (and maybe because) the Word has challenged me to re-think my entire way of doing things and re-examine how Jesus wants us to live. If you haven't had the opportunity to hear them, I would encourage you to go to www.lcbcchurch.com to listen to them.

The sermon started with Luke 9:51, where Jesus "resolutely" set out for Jerusalem. This was the start of Jesus' journey to be crucified, and He was resolute in His purpose as he went. [This verse reminded me of Daniel 1 where Daniel "resolved" not to eat the choice food but instead set himself apart for higher purposes.] As Jesus was walking, He talked to three men as we continue with the scripture through Luke 9:63. The subtitle is "The Cost of Following Jesus."

• The first said he would follow Jesus wherever he went and Jesus replied that He didn't have even a place to lay His head. Then Jason went on to describe how Jesus knew that He was going to be rejected, betrayed and not welcomed. Most wouldn't choose this kind of life. This journey isn't about us but rather about God. 
• Then Jesus met another who wanted to bury is father, and what this man was really saying was 'some day I'll follow you,' but Jesus said in essence 'not one day but today.' Jason further explained that the expectation was that the children would bury their parents but Jesus was asking if this man would go against expectations and care more about what God thought than people. There will be lots of people in society that will do the 'expected' things but few who follow God's will.
• The third man said he had to say goodbye to his family. Jason noted that in that culture, that meant that the man was asking his father for permission to go and was already laying the foundations for his excuse of why he couldn't go with Jesus. Jesus, using the example of the plow, showed how important the intense focus and level of intention it took to follow Him. Jason demonstrated that one hand would be steering the ox and one hand would be driving the plow and even a slight deviation could ruin the whole field. Your eyes needed to look solely on the prize or a look back would wreck the work at hand. We can't dwell on the past or look to others instead of God.

Finally, the sermon started concluding with the verses from Luke 13:22 and Matthew 7:13-14 about the importance of working hard to enter the narrow door of God's kingdom. We don't just stumble into a life with Jesus. It takes intention and focus and the realization that sometimes it leads to rejection. Then Jason used the example of where the interstate dumps off in Harrisburg and there is less than six feet to get to the Lancaster exit. You have to put the peddle to the metal, be paying attention and not be scared about the other cars who are moving this way and that if you're going to get your exit. Otherwise, you miss it. Not paying attention will lead to a wider path that isn't the correct one. Other cars will encourage you to go on the wrong path. You have to grit your teeth and 'fight' for it. But, it leads to the way of life.

Then we ended with the fact that saying "YES!" to Jesus leads saying "NO!" to a lot of other things. For the second man to say yes to Jesus, he'd have to say no to fulfilling other people's expectations of him. We were asked to write down things where we felt like Jesus was asking us to say YES to him and NO to other things. Examples were YES to generosity and NO to excess. Maybe it was YES to forgiveness and NO to revenge. There were many others. I felt like if I was going to say YES to Jesus' will for my life, then I needed to say NO to overindulging in food. It's easy to say yes and live up to expectations of this world - every time I resolve to eat less, I'm invited to social gathering of eating out or a special birthday party with cake & ice cream. These are seemingly little things but they've kept me on the wide path (no pun intended) and not on the narrow path where I am supposed to be. 

I chose to symbolically walk through the door of saying yes to Jesus and no to things of this world.. to be intentional in my path of choosing. This is going to be a hard week for it - it's my birthday, and we have lots of plans. Plans with family and friends and just us and I'm sure lots of sweets from my sweetie. Please pray for me in this journey. Let's walk the narrow path together. For, no one whose hope is in the Lord will ever be put to shame!!!

Dear God, thank You for Your Word. Thank You for giving it meaning in our lives. Thank You for beckoning us onto a narrow path - thank You for calling us by name and choosing us. Lord, we don't deserve it. It's by Your grace that we're here. Please help us journey with You and choose the narrow path. We say YES to what You have for us and NO to things of this world and the expectation that we would eat at every opportunity everything that is put before us. Help us choose to say NO when the Spirit leads us. And may we not focus on ourselves or look back at our past but rather keep our intention pure and on You and Your kingdom. May we glorify You. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

Do Not Set Your Heart on What You Will Eat or Drink

^"And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it." Luke 12:29

This past weekend at church, we heard a good sermon on what's controlling us. The first story we looked at was in Luke 18 where Jesus told the wealthy man to sell everything he had and give it to the poor then to come follow Him. The man left sad because he rich. The speaker made this point: it wasn't necessarily about money for all of us - some of us become controlled by money, but some of us are controlled by other things.

He then asked the question, what do we have our hands on so tightly that we would be sad and 'miss Jesus' calling' if He asked us to give it up? While possessions may not matter, maybe it's control over a person or situation. He said maybe it's a title or position. Maybe it's work we do. He gave the example of a mom who came to him and told him all about her son who wasn't living the way she wanted him to. He said this mom was so upset, she was all but screaming until the end and her blood pressure was sky high. At the end of the day, while the mother wanted to control the son's behavior, his behavior was controlling her. She was the one losing sleep and upset while he was doing what he wanted. He asked again, what haven't we given over to God? What do we think we need to control?

The sermon series is called 'flip side' and the point is that when we give God the control, He in turn gives us freedom. The next set of verses from Luke 12 began my wheels turning.

Do Not Worry

 ²²Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. ²³Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. ²⁴Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! ²⁵Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life^[l]? ²⁶Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

 ²⁷"Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ²⁸If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! ²⁹And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. ³⁰For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. ³¹But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.

 ³²"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. ³³Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. ³⁴For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Where was my treasure? Recently we were asked to do a 5-day fast where we ate nothing but rice &  beans to get a feel for how the truly poor lived. Wanting to lose some weight in the process, I tried to have nothing but one meal of rice & beans so I could truly experience the 'poor life.' The speaker (I'm not sure if he's the pastor, but I know he's at least the youth leader if not the youth pastor of the church) said that when we fast, we often have SEVERE cravings that come up in our lives. Often, when we're giving up food, we start desiring specific foods in a way we never thought possible. The lack of what we want makes us grumpy and it starts controlling our thoughts. We as Christians then realize that if food can have this powerful effect on us, there are other things that can control us that we don't even realize as well.

I was listening intently as originally I thought maybe it was food controlling my life. He wasn't kidding about those cravings. I wanted pineapple (of all things) in the worst kind of way! But the more the sermon went on, the more I realized that once again what I had allowed to control my thoughts was the desire to be thin and healthy. I don't remember if it was that morning or the morning before as I was going jogging, I thought to myself "if I could double my workouts, maybe I could lose some weight before my birthday." So, I began thinking about getting up early to work out and then doing it again while my children napped. Then I began obsessing about what I could eat during those next couple weeks (this birthday one is a 'big' one for me...ugh!).

As we read the verses about 'do not worry,' I began to hear God once again reigning me in. I hadn't done anything to accomplish my previous weight loss. And when I start trying to control it, it seems like my eating becomes anything but healthy and I put on more pounds rather than shed them. You see, where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. I had been allowing my desire to become healthy to start being my treasure and therefore affecting my heart and actions. I was more concerned with it than with Jesus and what He is calling me to do. I was ashamed to go back to the same evil of obsessing over food - only this time, it was wearing a disguise. 

Life is more than food, the body more than clothes. We're not to worry about what we're going to eat. That means we don't have to 'diet' per se. We are to eat what God tells us to and not go crazy. We're not to be gluttonous and yet we're not to starve ourselves. God knows what we need. He designed our bodies and He knows how they operate best. His Holy Spirit is ready, willing and able to prompt us on good choices, and by all means we should follow Him. But, we don't need to take the reigns and dig our claws in so tight that we're no longer giving God the glory or allowing Him to work in us and through us. This pursuit had started controlling me, my thoughts and my time (without any success, I might add).

The sermon ended with this powerful note: if God took whatever it is that you've dug your claws into so fiercely, could you still love Him and be happy with life? (Okay, so that's not word-for-word, but it's basically how I understood the question.) Could I stay overweight if God so desired and still be head over heels in love with Him, honor and serve Him, and give Him my life? I cringed at the thought. I knew the answer had to be yes. Still I was struggling. So, I admitted to God that I was struggling. I told Him my desire, but I also told Him that I loved Him and it wasn't about my body, which is here today and gone... well, hopefully not tomorrow, but soon enough! I told Him I would serve Him until the end, and I was taking my claws out of this pursuit. It wasn't about me, anyway.

The next night, I saw a glimpse of a VERY attractive young blond gal who had just lost the battle to cancer. It was the only reminder I needed. I would give anything to see my kids grow up and hopefully their kids someday. I'm happy with the body God has given me. While I want to treat it respectfully, I'll be honored to serve God in whatever vessel He's given me.

I continue to work out. It makes me feel good, and I know it's good for me. I'm still trying to get up early to do it, because I think that's what God is calling me to. I also ate healthier this week than I have in a long time. But, I'm not obsessing over it. I'm taking one day at a time and not living for my own glory, but the Lord's.

This was a good reminder for me, and I hope it also helps you as we glorify God together with our bodies. Let's not set our heart on what we'll eat or drink (and I could even go on and on about what cravings can do to us! But that's for another post someday!). Let's seek Jesus first and His kingdom. I believe God will add everything else in His time, whether in this life or the next. Much love, my sisters (& brothers, if any read this blog).

Dear Heavenly Father, once again I must confess how sorry I am for trying to control something I have no business controlling. I'm sorry for where I've dug my claws in and stopped enjoying the weight loss but being controlled by it. Forgive me, I humbly ask! Help me start again, where my focus is on You and my desire is for You alone. May I treat this body as a vessel for Your Holy Spirit and Your glory. May I do Your will and bring You glory. We love You, sweet Jesus. Thank You for always reminding us and standing with us. In Your Name we pray, AMEN!

Given to Gluttony = Death

"...and put a knife to your throat if you are given to gluttony." Proverbs 23:2

This verse made me think "OUCH!" The verses around it say not to crave the delicacies of a ruler for that food is deceptive. Then the Bible goes on to talk about restraint. I've not practiced restraint when I've wanted something to eat. The verse above  makes me realize how serious God is about this sin that we take so casually. I've given myself over to the deception of food before... I think, 'oh, just this one time of having a little too much or living it up in the chocolate I'm craving can't hurt; after all, I'll just work harder tomorrow.' But, tomorrow, saying no to temptation is just that much harder, especially once I've put on a few pounds.

I'm not suggesting we kill ourselves, but I am noting how serious the sin of gluttony really is. I know I tend to think of sins in terms of consequences. Surely I'm not as bad as someone who has committed murder, right? Just because I'm overeating, I'm just hurting myself. But, I have to remember that I matter to God. My body matters to God. He created it and I've been destroying it. I'm essentially killing myself slowly. And, in the process, I've been giving into temptation and sin that I KNOW is wrong. Yet, I'm always giving excuses for why it's okay 'just this once.' I know it's important to take a stand, and yet I've been luke warm.

This has been the hardest struggle of my life. And, while I thought it would get easier, it's still something I have to give to the Lord every day. He is the Savior. It's only through His Word and His grace that I'm even able to type this. I am a sinner. Plain. Simple. But, I'm also loved by God and saved through the blood of Jesus. I struggle with overindulgence. But, I know that I can overcome through Christ if I trust in Him. Salvation won't come on my own - I don't have the willpower. But, I can take one step at a time with God who guides me through His Word.

Please pray for me in this journey, and I will pray for you as well. We need God's help to keep us from temptation and deliver us from evil!

Dear God, please forgive us where we've given ourselves over to gluttony. Lord, I can see in the Bible that You find this behavior repulsive. Yet, I've read of Your unfailing, faithful love to Your people - even when they worshiped idols, so long as they repented and turned back to You, You rescued them. God, we're asking for the same mercy and grace. Once again, we ask for the blood of Jesus to cover our sin. Lord, instead of us slitting our own throats, we are coming before Your thrown and asking for help to turn from our wicked ways. Help us to be mindful of what we're doing to our bodies when we are eating. Help us eat enough but not get lazy and eat as much as we're used to consuming. Help us live for Your glory. Forgive us, oh God, and save us from temptation. Deliver us from evil as only You can. We need Your mercy and grace. We love You and long to glorify You with our bodies. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

Wanna Stop Messing Up?

"Great peace have they who love Your law, and nothing can make them stumble." Psalm 119:165

My husband & I were just talking about how we took a step off the right road these past few months and headed back the same old path of not eating well and not keeping a strong workout regime going. I think the hardest step is the one to commit to doing better and going for it once again.

So how do we stop from 'stumbling' as we're trying to walk this walk? Loving God's law. Not just casually reading it, not just listening to stories from the pulpit, but adoring it. Reading it, saying it, praying it, remembering it, hiding it in our hearts, bringing it forth in our speech, LOVING it. When I think about how much I love my kids and husband, I think about the time I spend with them and on them. While I love God's Word, I'm not sure I've given the study thereof as much of my passion as I should be. I want to be the kind of believer whose "like it, love it, gotta have it" is about the Bible and not Coldstone ice cream.

Dear Lord, thank You for Your Word. Thank You for the peace You provide through it. Please keep us devoted to knowing You through the Bible, and keep us from stumbling. May our lives be a pure reflection of You. In Jesus' name, AMEN!