Let Me Not Eat of Their Delicacies

"Let not my heart be drawn to what is evil, to take part in wicked deeds with men who are evildoers; let me not eat of their delicacies." Psalm 141:4

Do you ever feel drawn to food? Like it's calling your name? I struggle with cravings... but it's not vegetables or healthy things I typically crave. What I desire would be richer foods that could be likened to the word 'delicacies' in this passage. I'm learning this battle of the bulge starts with our heart and mind and then turns into either sin or the Lord's refinement in our lives if we say 'yes' to His Spirit and 'no' to the things of this world like casual eating.

One thing I learned in one of my Bible studies was to pray God's Word. There is power in it! Let's pray this verse together - may God help us in this struggle for His ultimate glory.

Father God, we lay our lives before You once again. Thank You for Your Word. Please don't let our hearts be drawn to what is evil, in every dimension of what that word means for us in our lives. Particularly, please keep us from overeating, casual eating... even eating that is done socially with others who don't have the same values as we do for our lives or don't struggle with the same temptations. Stop us from eating their delicacies. Teach us to do what is right. But even more than that God, how I beg for You to step in and guard our mouths, hearts and bodies! There are times I desperately wish You would take my free will from me since I keep making unwise choices. But, I know You are refining me each day in helping me choose better. Lord, forgive us where we have sinned and keep us from it in the future. We ask that You make us healthy and thin for Your glory. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

They Ate Until They Had More Than Enough

"They willfully put God to the test by demanding the food they craved." Psalm 78:18

While I haven't written anything in a little bit, I've still been reading my Bible every morning. This has been a difficult journey for me to lose weight. I realize now more than ever that this has to be a complete life change - not a diet but a day-to-day dialogue with God. And I know that there are people suffering in the world from things that aren't caused by their own sin, and I don't want to say that my struggles even come close to those. I'm just being honest about where I'm at. I lose a couple then gain a couple then lose, etc. I don't want to go back to my old lifestyle, so I'm holding onto Jesus like never before. These are the times that He carries me. I have willingly given in on occasions and must continue to seek forgiveness for not doing what I know is right.

You may get tired of reading this (if you even are still reading) and think that I should have this down pat like a science. The truth is that with addiction, one step back can be so damaging. So, I again say that my only hope is in God alone. This weekend we worshiped to a song that said "ALL MY HOPE'S IN YOU, MY STRENGTH, MY SONG..." It is ever true in my life.

Weeks ago, I woke up asking for God to continue to reveal Himself to me, particularly in this area of struggling with obesity. As part of my ongoing reading of the Old Testament, Psalm 78 was one of the chapters that I was about to read... and wow did it hit home!

As you read the above verse, I hope you remember that in Deuteronomy 6 it says you shouldn't put God to the test. I felt utterly repulsive as I thought about my own cravings and 'demands' for food. I'll be honest and say there have been times where I have demanded from my husband that we go out to eat, etc. How much this dishonors God blew me away. Maybe it would be helpful to read more of Psalm 78. Here are verses 1-38. Pay particular attention to verses 17-30.

Psalm 78


1 O my people, hear my teaching; listen to the words of my mouth. 2 I will open my mouth in parables, I will utter hidden things, things from of old- 3 what we have heard and known, what our fathers have told us.
4 We will not hide them from their children; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD, his power, and the wonders he has done.


5 He decreed statutes for Jacob and established the law in Israel, which he commanded our forefathers to teach their children, 6 so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children. 7 Then they would put their trust in God and would not forget his deeds but would keep his commands.


8 They would not be like their forefathers— a stubborn and rebellious generation, whose hearts were not loyal to God, whose spirits were not faithful to him. 9 The men of Ephraim, though armed with bows, turned back on the day of battle; 10 they did not keep God's covenant and refused to live by his law. 11 They forgot what he had done, the wonders he had shown them.

12 He did miracles in the sight of their fathers in the land of Egypt, in the region of Zoan. 13 He divided the sea and led them through; he made the water stand firm like a wall. 14 He guided them with the cloud by day and with light from the fire all night. 15 He split the rocks in the desert and gave them water as abundant as the seas; 16 he brought streams out of a rocky crag and made water flow down like rivers.


17 But they continued to sin against him, rebelling in the desert against the Most High. 18 They willfully put God to the test by demanding the food they craved. 19 They spoke against God, saying, "Can God spread a table in the desert? 20 When he struck the rock, water gushed out, and streams flowed abundantly. But can he also give us food? Can he supply meat for his people?"


21 When the LORD heard them, he was very angry; his fire broke out against Jacob, and his wrath rose against Israel, 22 for they did not believe in God or trust in his deliverance.


23 Yet he gave a command to the skies above and opened the doors of the heavens; 24 he rained down manna for the people to eat, he gave them the grain of heaven. 25 Men ate the bread of angels; he sent them all the food they could eat. 26 He let loose the east wind from the heavens and led forth the south wind by his power. 27 He rained meat down on them like dust, flying birds like sand on the seashore. 28 He made them come down inside their camp, all around their tents.


29 They ate till they had more than enough, for he had given them what they craved. 30 But before they turned from the food they craved, even while it was still in their mouths, 31 God's anger rose against them; he put to death the sturdiest among them, cutting down the young men of Israel.


32 In spite of all this, they kept on sinning; in spite of his wonders, they did not believe. 33 So he ended their days in futility and their years in terror.


34 Whenever God slew them, they would seek him; they eagerly turned to him again. 35 They remembered that God was their Rock, that God Most High was their Redeemer. 36 But then they would flatter him with their mouths, lying to him with their tongues; 37 their hearts were not loyal to him, they were not faithful to his covenant.


38 Yet he was merciful; he forgave their iniquities and did not destroy them. Time after time he restrained his anger and did not stir up his full wrath.


You see, I already wrote about the actual event when it 'first' happened in my reading from the Old Testament. But, God once again wanted to show me that morning how important it is that we evaluate our cravings and desires. Can God satisfy our needs without food being involved?

I've noticed at parties that people who struggle with food are often the first ones to the 'buffet' line (for lack of a better expression) while people who don't have weight problems tend to get there last and don't seem to care if everything is gone or not. It seems obvious but not when you're the one hungry and being invited to go fill your plate. Could you not get anything and still be satisfied with what God has given you? Can you be satisfied with His Living Water?

Recently our church asked us to go 12 hours without clean water of any kind (and no other beverages) - no drinks, no toilet flushing, no hand washing, no shower, etc. to relate to poor people all over the world who don't have access to water. It was awful! How much I take for granted something like water (when truly, I love diet soda and iced tea, etc). Water is a precious gift from God. Do we use it like it's meant to be used? Or are we craving 'deadly' things?

Lastly, my heart breaks again at verse 29 "They ate until they had more than enough, for He had given them what they had craved." But, God's anger broke out against them and killed them while they were still chewing. It makes me sad to think about ... God will give us what we crave. We can choose to eat more than enough, or we can choose to crave Him and His righteousness. Our obesity can kill us, even as we're still chewing! Or, we can choose to crave a pure heart and things of God, and He will grant our request. God is a loving and merciful God. He longs for us to make the right choice. Can we do that today?

Dear God, please help us make the right choice. Help us crave things of You and not stuff of this earth. God, we know meat isn't wrong, but we also know that putting You to the test is. Please shape our hearts and minds through Your Word and Holy Spirit and thus shape our bodies. Forgive us for when we have craved unholy things - help us start fresh today. Please make us healthy and thin for Your glory (not ours). In Jesus' name, AMEN!

The Lord Will Fulfill His Purpose For Us

"The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever— do not abandon the works of your hands." Psalm 138:8

This morning as I was devouring my Bible, hungry for more of God, this particular verse stood out to me. I've had my ups and downs on this journey. Lately, I've felt like there have been more downs (and not in my overall weight!). I struggle to try and eat healthy, I wrestle with wanting this journey to be about God's glory and not about me, I battle with finding time to exercise and getting out of bed in the morning to do so since that's a time that can't be stolen for other purposes.... but this verse gave me peace. God reminded me that the LORD will fulfill HIS purposes for me. And He loves me. Amidst my sin and willing walk back into captivity, He hasn't abandoned me. I am the work of His hands. His loving hands.

May this verse remind you today that God has a purpose for you. And He loves you. He won't abandon you, but He will fulfill that purpose if you let Him. He is a good God and worthy to be praised!

Dear God, thank You for Your love. Thank You for Your purpose for us. Please don't abandon us! Fulfill your purpose for our lives. Help us become healthy and thin for Your glory, to fulfill whatever work You would have us do on this earth for as long as we can until we praise You in heaven. We love You, Lord Jesus. In Your Name we pray, AMEN!

For God Does Speak

"...so that his very being finds food repulsive and his soul loathes the choicest meal." Job 33:20

Think the Bible doesn't have anything to say on eating, weight loss, your journey with food? Think again! I read this passage the other week and it jumped out at me for a couple reasons. First, I had had a terrible dream the night before. It seemed so real that when I woke up sweating and crying, I didn't even know where I was at first. I won't go into my entire dream, but here are parts of it: I dreamed I had pulled on my dad's arm as he was coming down a 'ladder' (of sorts). I was impatient and felt like he was moving too slow and holding me and my sisters up, so I grabbed his hand and gave it a tug, thinking it would help him find his footing and continue to come down.... only in my dream, he fell the whole way down (from me throwing him off balance) and he landed face first into cement. I remember seeing his face, his nose bleeding and cut open, his eyes immediately black and blue from his broken nose, and he was crying. (Now, for those of you who don't know my Dad, he is a big 'manly' guy who I've only seen cry once in my life when he told me that he & my mom were splitting up.) He was still on the ground on his knees, his nose gushing blood, and he kept apologizing for falling and then finally in his weakness said, "... who's pulling on me?" in a really sad and forlorn voice. I remember in my dream, I threw myself on the ground (much like my children do when they're having a fit). I beat my hands into the cement and kicked my feet and crying in loud anguish I proclaimed "Dad, it was me! I'm sorry! I'm a disease to everyone around me! I've had the worst day!" And I woke up. I felt terrible. I went to the bathroom to splash cold water on my face, and I saw that it was 2:30 am. I couldn't get back to sleep. I almost called my Dad then, but my husband who had heard me get up had woken up and told me that I should go back to sleep and not wake anyone else.

The next morning, as I was still troubled from my dream, I read the following passage in the Bible:

"14 For God does speak - now one way,

now another - 

though man may not perceive it.

15 In a dream, in a vision of the night,

when deep sleep falls on men

as they slumber in their beds,

16 he may speak in their ears

and terrify them with warnings,

17 to turn man from wrongdoing

and keep him from pride,

18 to preserve his soul from the pit (or grave),

his life from perishing by the sword (or from crossing the River).

19 Or a man may be chastened on a bed of pain

with constant distress in his bones,

20 so that his very being finds food

repulsive

and his soul loathes the choicest meal.

Job 33:14-20

I did call my Dad later that day to make sure he hadn't fallen, and I told him about my dream and about this passage in the Bible. I also told my mom, and she said to ask God what He was trying to say. One thing I see for sure is that God speaks in dreams "to turn man from wrongdoing and keep him from his pride" (verse 17). I surely do need help in keeping from intentionally sinning and from pride - this evil thing that creeps up inside even when we don't realize it.

But, I also saw at the bottom of this passage the warning that if we're not careful to overcome this addiction to food - slavery to sin and overindulgence - we may end up in a bed of pain, where we eventually are so sick that we find food & choice meals repulsive and loathsome. I don't want sickness to be the way to my recovery, if at all possible. In fact, I used to pray "make me thin" and then added to that "please make me healthy and thin."

I admit that I'm still struggling with this same sin. I'm still giving into the temptation to eat at times that I shouldn't and eat things that I shouldn't. I'm still struggling to wake up early and exercise. But, I fear God. I know that He is full of mercy, compassion and grace. And yet He controls the universe and does things that we may not understand for our best interest. Earlier in the Bible it says "And he (God) said to man, 'the fear of the Lord - that is wisdom, and to shun evil is understanding.'" Job 28:28.

I don't have all the answers for weight loss. I know that it is a difficult journey that is only made possible through God Himself. To begin, I think it's important to have a healthy fear of the Lord. And next it's important to begin shunning evil. If we could walk in the steps God has provided for us, I believe we would have healthy bodies, operating the way God intended for them when He created them. That is what I desire! And, I'd really like for that to happen without a bed of pain and distress in my bones. Let's do this God's way!

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for speaking to us, even when we don't perceive it as the above verse states. Lord, tell us what You desire for us. We are listening to You. Thank You for Your grace for us. We don't feel like we deserve Your love, but we are so grateful for it. God, we ask that You would make us healthy and thin. Help us learn how to properly eat so that we don't have to be in pain to loathe food or choice meals. Speak to us God, and help us shun evil and fear You alone. We love You and long to do what's right so we can spend eternity with You. Thank You for saving us through Jesus since we would not be able to come to You any other way. We love You and long to honor and serve You. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

Appeal to God

"But if it were I, I would appeal to God; I would lay my cause before Him. He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted." Job 5:8-9

There are many days that I feel like losing weight is next to impossible. But, to a God who created the entire Universe (including me!), weight loss isn't beyond Him. He's performed miracles that can't even be fathomed, so helping us drop some pounds should be a snap to Him. Thus, we need to lay our cause before Him. Let's appeal to God and watch Him change our bodies and our lives for His glory! He can do this!

Dear God, we appeal to You; our cause is to be healthy and thin for Your ultimate glory. We believe in the miracles that You have performed - You opened and closed the red sea, sent manna from heaven to feed Your people, You led the Israelites with a cloud by day and a fire by night; You sent Your son to die on the cross and rise again in three days; You have healed the sick, made the blind see and the lame walk. Lord, we know that You can drop the pounds from our bodies. We know that You can transform our shape and figure. We know that You can motivate us, help us eat healthier and enjoy it, and that You can fix the damage we've done to our bodies. Lord, we need You. We can't overcome the battle of the bulge without You. Please help us! Perform a miracle in us today, we ask with a please. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

Rely on the Lord

"The men of Israel were subdued on that occasion, and the men of Judah were victorious because they relied on the Lord, the God of their fathers." 2 Chronicles 13:18

This morning as I was reading my Bible, I asked God for insight into this weight loss journey. And He is faithful! I was told by my surgeon earlier this week that I should 'take it easy' and not exercise, saying the pain I'm continuing to experience since my surgery (which was over six weeks ago!) is probably because I'm overdoing it. I almost cried on the phone. It's driving me crazy! If I can't exercise, how am I going to continue to lose weight? And yet, the other evening when I decided to go for a jog in this above-freezing weather, I didn't even make it half way to the park before grabbing hold of a tree to keep me upright since I felt like someone was stabbing me in my side.

Frustrated, I cried out to God this morning. And this verse spoke to me. Why were the men of Judah victorious over the men of Israel? After all, wasn't Israel the name of God's chosen nation? This verse tells us that Judah had success because they relied on the Lord, the God of their fathers. (This was, of course, when Judah had split away from Israel for this period of history.) The leader of Israel at this time was worshiping idols and causing others to sin against the Lord. The men of Judah, however, "had not forsaken" the Lord; in fact, they said "God is with us; He is our leader" (v 12). Judah was being attacked at both the front and rear (v 14) - nonetheless, when they cried out to the Lord, 'God delivered them into their hands' (vs 16).

I realized that I'm feeling a bit defeated - attacked on both sides (not being able to work out and being tempted by food). But, when I feel like I'm at the end of myself, what does the Bible tell me I need to do? I need to cry out to God. For when I rely on Jesus alone, He wins the victory. I can't take credit. It has to be an obvious show of God's amazing glory, might and power. I believe that God can still be victorious when I feel defeated. And may He receive all the honor due His name through it.

Dear Heavenly Father, we confess just like in 2 Chronicles 14:11 "Lord, there is no one like You to help the powerless against the mighty. Help us, O Lord our God, for we rely on You, and in Your name we have come against this vast army. O Lord, You are our God; do not let man prevail against You." Father, we pray for the crushing defeat that the men of Judah saw before their eyes. We pray that you not only make us lose weight, You make us positively thin and healthy for Your glory. Lord God, we know that we can't win this battle of the bulge on our own. We see the attack of the enemy before us and behind us. But, God, You are bigger, stronger, more powerful and more wonderful than any enemy and any temptation. Father God, for Your own name and for Your children, we ask for Your help. Make our temples holy and pure for Your dwelling. May we be more like You. In Jesus' name, AMEN!

Do It All For the Glory of God

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." 1 Corinthians 10:31

As I was driving to school/work today, I was listening to an old Jeremy Riddle CD of my husband's. As I was singing along, I thought about God being love and just all at the same time (in his "Sweetly Broken" song). I thought about how much I don't deserve God's grace, and yet His love is unfailing. I'm so thankful for the cross today. I've been feeling a little emotional lately, probably because of being inside and not getting enough Vitamin D. But, today in particular I was feeling just an overwhelming awe at Christ's work on the cross. He won the victory for us. We are saved through His grace.

It amazes me that God can take an overweight, out-of-shape body like mine and transform it. I don't deserve it. I've done damage to this 'vehicle' God has given me. But, we know that eating less and exercising will get us back to where we belong. It reminds me of little girls who cut their doll's hair and cry when it won't grow back. But, when we (God's children) get a bad haircut, we have hope for new growth. Again, I feel so undeserving of this miracle... my own sin is what got me here. But, Christ died for me (and you!) to restore my relationship with God and my sin is washed away.

If you're feeling like getting healthier is an uphill battle, remember that Christ already walked the uphill battle for you. His grace saves you. His blood covers you. His mercy will renew and strengthen you. His love will amaze you. So, as you worship this awesome God today, as you eat or drink and in whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

Dear Heavenly Father, I bow before You in worship. On my face, I praise You for who You are. I am so thankful, God. Thank You for new opportunities. Thank You for never giving up on us. Thank You for new life, new hope, new dreams, new purpose. Thank You that You can restore us. Thank You for the cross. Thank You for Your blood. Thank You for taking away our sin. May we glorify You in ALL we do today, including our eating and drinking. We love You! In Jesus' name, AMEN!